Torn....

Question: How is it that when you finally establish yourself somewhere, learn the language, actually have friends, don't have trouble finding plans and feel comfortable in your environment.....it comes time to say goodbye.....

I had a great evening tonight! Went out with about 20 people from my school for my friend Julia's birthday. There was nothing especially special about it, except that I felt pretty well comfortable with the situation. (One thing I've really missed here is being able to share what I learn/experience with someone here....its so hard to actually say what actually goes on a couple days later on the phone.)

and I know you're probably thinking...what's so great about feeling comfortable.....but its a big deal!! As we were leaving the school after choir, it's a bunch of people that I know in varying degrees....some I've had good convo's with, some I just say hi to.....but they all come from the same country, speak the same language and have studied together for a couple years already....and then there's me :).....

so in these situations, I always try and pick out one person that I feel comfortable talking with, and that if I ask them how they are, they'll take the time to talk with me. Tonight it was Ingo :)....and I often find, once I have one person that I'm engaged in a good conversation with, people see me as more approachable or even want to join OUR conversation! and I'm in!

See the thing is, is that at the beginning, I was interesting, and people wanted to talk to me because I was from across the world.....but I could barely talk with them without there being misunderstandings or things that needed to be erklart (cleared up).....Now, I'm that foreign kid that's been around forever, and if we havn't talked already, then why would we start now ya know? (try and picture an exchange student in your class) When now, I could ACTUALLY have a conversation that FLOWED!

So tonight was a good night. Why? because I was with a bunch of great people....I pushed myself out there once again, and opened up conversations with people that I havn't really talked to that much, and other people were open to talking with me....

I really love these people and place, and am starting to feel really torn between the two.

love
K